when u get toooo damn close

darn!!!! today had a mad rush at the darkroom.... where we have to submit like 6 prints.. which seems like the easiest thingy in the world to me.. ok.. not just me.. seems like everyone else in having problem with that...
K was ultra nice to me today.. seems like being "too close for comfort".... no no.. damn uncomfortable anyway.. who in the world would tell u that he is single out of the damn sudden moment!!!! got developer on my hands and the nxt thing i know.. he HELP me to tie up my hair with his hands.. jus like the way in taiwan shows where the male lead hold the hair of the lady? ya.. tat way!!! being soooooooooooo gentle that it irks me!!!! its like what the hell is he trying to do!! Men!! they just cant seems to have their hands on themselves!!

ps. miss u

ok.. darn... damn it.... arrghhh

i miss u

holy smoke!

meet up with the bitches today.. ok another set of bitches.. mic, ling and new gal marie... fannie was there as well.. needless to say.. jeff was there!! met up for drink at amara hotel.. the usual shipping place.. omg! i misss mic!!!!! the worst part of meeting mic is the part where i auto pick up a ciggie and SMOKE.. damn right! had not been smoking since end may till date! even when he smoke, i managed not to pick up the ciggie.. damn mic!! i pick up menthol light!!! wahahaha bt the branded one of cos! lolz!! finish a bott at amara and head on to fullerton for dinner n DRINK.. of cos drink.. its jeff!!! saw stephen too! as charming as ever!!! cute HKee! wahaha..
hence totally i pick up half a pack from 6.30pm allllll the way to 10pm!!! crazy ! trust me! once u off hire a ciggie.. dun ever pick it up! from the 1st min of picking it up, it will get u hook back again!!! ciggie meanie ciggie!!! tink i smell toooo much menthol light already... hmmmm half pack n i haven got drunk! lol

just me.. life updates

3 wks to my new job and things seems to be kinda OK for me. Waking up at 7am daily is not that bad already. Used to wake up later and having to get to work at a later time, also, managed to off work late too. These days, I had officially gotten into the habit of sleeping before 1am.. and to wake up at 7am.. not as bad as I thought.. wonder why cant I do it the last time? Lol.. habits are not cultivated for nothing!

The guys in office are still the same, noisy rowdy and buaya!! SH (my boss) had been pretty attentive to me! Carrying files for me if they are deemed to be too heavy, trying to get me lunch when I stay in and nagging me to take my lunch! Lolz.. the other guys chalk up cakes, tibits for me!!! Princess in the office!! Now that I do not have to take up the multi roles.. haha doesn’t being having to stick to a boring job is such a damn good idea! Used to want to being able to role myself into the multiples and now that I got the chance to stick to the boring job of just 1 plain position in the office. Trust me, being able to off work at 6 is the best thing! Who cares about climbing the corporate ladder!! Jaded!!!!!!

Seems like this is a season to fall out of love, people around me seems to be falling out of love so bad that I feel painful and hurt when I see them. Gone are those friends who claimed that the sky belong to them, gone are those sweet nothings that I see them whispering. Couples that I thought would last a long long time are now telling me things like there is no love and love don’t last forever. Wonder why things like this do happen? I, myself had been through out of love, the hurt, the pain and the mistrust of the relationship. At 1 point of time, I do give up too! Sharing the same opnions as my frens are feeling now, suddenly, I wish they believe in love, to have that special someone who love them and to care for them and to believe in each other all over again. I really hope all my friends will find love and to have love for a long long long long time…. I really wonder how long will it take when u stop loving me.. will u stop loving me?

so long.. bad memories...

Packed my room in the morning, after going thru my stuff, I being dragging a lot of the long lost items that I had been keeping for the last few years.. bags and bags of memories that I had kept for years finally had to be throw out. Totally I dump like 8 big black plastic bags of rubbish.. no.. 8 bags of memories… initally, I thought that I will not bear to dump all the things that he had once given me, that’s really alof of things that I had with me.. the sadness that I had thought that I would feel were not missed at all.. none of the sadness came to visit and relieve came over me. The thought of not having to hold on to the bad memories made me feel so much no burden.. no relieve.. so relax..

Hope u can take of me the way u promise…

when life ends..

It had been a crazy week for me… grandma passed away last fri.. got calls from mum at 845am when I reach the office…. Mum said tat grandma wanted us to come back and all of us had to rush back home.. I even asked E whether should I take full or half day.. E scolded me and ask me to cut the crap and take full day off… as at 9.30am there is still no one available from my department yet. So I had no choice but to draft an email and forward to all of them. Reach home damn fast and in the short time, all of us were back home together.. grandma officially passed away at 1pm. It did not hurt as much as we thought it would, cause all of us were off rushing to get all the necessary work done.

The whole funeral was not tat of a sad affair.. and thanks to all of u lovely people who came over…. Guess seems like all of us expect this to happen 1 day and guess all of us are mentally ready for it. Well, the hardest part of the funeral was to stay through the night, lucky for me, kel was there and we talk.. chat…. Had not chat this way with him for a long long time.. but the late nights really drove us nuts.. by last night.. both of us KO..

DT was a really good boy thru this.. guess he know whats going on and he never once whine or cry when we leave him alone in the house..

on the last day of the funeral, the look on dad made me cry.. 1^st time in my life that I see my own father teared… mum cried hard too.. guess the tears that was found on dad drove me crying too.. suddenly, just so suddenly.. I wish all these is just a dream.. .

when home…. DT was soo happy to see all of us back home.. both him and me cuddle and jus snore… shag tat we were… DT worked hard.. taking care of the house and responding to the noises tat outsiders created.. now hardworking DT could finally rest.. .

Thought collecting the ash of grandma is the easier task compared to the funeral but its not so. It hurted me most… imagine a living human is being reduced to nothing but bones and ashes in a small tupperware.. some may think that its funny.. to me , its sad.. my grandma, reduce to nothing but some white calcium in a box!!

If life is to be reduced to something so insignificant, so small.. I learnt a lesson… to live my each day to the fullest as at the end of life, we are nothing but white ashes and calcium.. why do we have to hate and dislike our life and people around us? Why cant we enjoy the love around us? For all the hate that we filled and bottled up, we are jus ash to end it.. J

不能说的秘密

冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面
拼命想挽回的从前 在我脸上依旧清晰可见

最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐
回忆的画面在荡着秋千
梦开始不甜

你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
又何必去改变已走过的时间
你用你的指尖阻止我说再见
想象你在身边在完全失去之前

你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
或许命运的签只让我们遇见
只让我们相恋这一季的秋天
飘落后才发现这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡


Song for the moment cos it by Jay!


ok.. u know who giv it to me... lolz...